X-Factor 2013 is certainly missing the “Comedy Factor” this year and as the BBC spend their time concentrating on “Strictly Come Dancing” – a final decision on who will be drafted in to represent the UK at Eurovision 2014 will come at the last possible moment.
So it is coming up to that time of year when former X-Factor contest Rylan Clark says to the media “Pick me for Eurovision”. He did the same thing last year after the X-Factor and now he has started his campaign again.
In an interview with Star Magazine the singer/tv presenter/self promoter – has come out all guns a blazing to get the BBC’s attention.“I would love to do Eurovision. I’ve grown up with it. But it would have to be done the right way, not one of these soppy f***ing songs that Andrew Lloyd Webber keeps writing.”
Well as far as we know “SIR” Andrew Lloyd Weber has only composed one Eurovision entry for the UK – which has been the best result the country has had since 2003. However we will forgive Rylan for that one. He went on to say “Who the f**k is picking the songs? You’ve got to go for that Euro sound. It’s definitely something I’d love to do. Why not?”
Well Rylan has actually made a fairly descent point in that statement – even if he is somewhat course (like his vocals). Who at the BBC is making these decisions to send Acts to Eurovision that have little relevance to the public and certainly don’t showcase current British talent.
However we think that the BBC should select Rylan Clark for a number of reasons
- The BBC needs to help the struggling X-Factor boost their ratings. Bar a slim number of acts that are on the show, many fail to make any lasting impact on the music charts (bar One Direction for the time being). People just want to see them on the show and post a few cheeky tweets about the lack of talent (We have all done it). It is only when you get the comedy gold acts like Rylan that people tune into the show. So the BBC should help the X-Factor have a life after the Christmas final and bring Rylan into Eurovision to try and generate some audience for 2014 in the ITV show. It seems that “Strictly Comes Dancing” gets better when they have X-Factor on the rails – so keep it that way.
- Product Placement – Well Rylan is a “TOWIE” lad through and through. Only this week he has been overjoyed and showered his social media outlets with the news that he is the new face of “Sodastream”. Can you imagine that. He can be blowing bubbles while singing at Eurovision. The BBC could have their entire Eurovision expenses covered by Rylan’s Cherry – flavoured Sodastream Drink that is! No need to hire in a wind machine for his performance – just crack open a few gas canisters from those lovely people at Sodastream!
- If the BBC are not willing to get a current artist to represent them at Eurovision, then why not get Rylan to enter. You cannot deny that he comes out with some cracking one liners. Could you imagine the 2 month run up to Eurovision. Everyday would be comedy gold from Rylan’s twitter account for one. Then imagine him once he gets to Copenhagen. His press conferences would be legendary! The BBC could not afford to buy such publicity and column inches. Just think about his 3 minutes on stage at Eurovision. The British public would be glued to their tv screens – either out of pride (ahem) or wanting to see a car crash performance – Job done for the BBC ratings wise. No fear of the headache of having to host in 2015 but still managing to get record ratings on the BBC. If you are a BBC executive then you just sit back and let Rylan take over.
- Rylan has all the connections to make sure he can put on a 3 minute show that will have jaws dropping across Europe. He would have Gary Borelow (sorry Barlow) on speed dial to critique his performance. If Gary doesn’t like it then you know you are doing something good and entertaining – and to think he used to be so cool in Take That! How times have changed.
- Rylan could do some charitable work and bring his Bezzie mate Katie Price aka Jordan to Eurovision. She tried before in 2005 but Javine (a fellow talent show reject) pipped her to the post. Could you imagine Rylan and Katie at Eurovision? Now we are getting interesting people!
- Conservation is not a choice but an obligation that we all have to the world and its animals. Well Rylan has shown us before that he is an animal lover – especially of the endangered Panda. You must remember how he had thousands of dancing pandas on stage with him for “Groove Is In The Heart” – People that is a man with a conscience and Europe will love that!
- Do you know what has been missing from Eurovision for the past few years? It has been some true emotions. I want to see my singers crying for their country and the contest. Blood, Sweat and Tears will help you win Eurovision and nobody does tears better than Rylan. This performance has to be worth at least a couple of 12 points alone
- Now you certainly want your artist to be patriotic and fly their flag with pride. Not only would Rylan fly the flag, he will bedazzle it and wear it for all to see. You would know what country was performing with Rylan performing. Instant reaction that is sure to “Spice Up Your Life” – as you can see
- When it comes to the vocals you really don’t care as it is all about the show that leaves you speechless one way or another. Rylan is an experience!
Now don’t get me wrong – he was my favourite contestant on the X-Factor in 2012 by a country mile. Yes he is not the best singer in the world but my word, he will certainly entertain you with every false eyelash and nail on his body. The BBC is in serious need of the fun factor at Eurovision 2014 and somebody who is young enough and has to look up YouTube to see who Bucks Fizz are. BBC get Rylan to sign on the dotted line for Eurovision 2014 or he maybe singing for Switzerland!!
Author/Website co-founder and Editor in Chief Garrett Mulhall
Source : Star Magazine